What I Learned From a Rattlesnake about the Role Fear Played in My Life
In Nature-Based Therapy, there is recognition of our innate connection as humans to the rest of the natural world. Within this awareness, there is an invitation to notice what we may be able to learn from other beings, especially when we are intentionally connecting with them and/or witnessing them. This week, I was invited to learn from an encounter with a rattlesnake.
I found myself at the Chimney Gulch trailhead in Golden, Colorado in sweltering temperatures. I went to this trailhead to engage in an Eco-Therapy walking practice. The intention of the practice was to learn from nature about a question I was holding in my own life. The question was: “What do I need to let go of in order to move forward?”.
As I set foot on the trail, I found myself in a spiral of fear. I was very aware that rattlesnakes are often out on trails in this area, especially during hot times of day. I cautiously made my way up the trail, feeling hyper-vigilant, watching for any movement in the tall grass around me, any sign that there was danger. I felt my heart racing and the sun pounding down on me. I continued to think about my question but found that I could not witness or feel into the rest of the world around me because I was so focused on the potential snake I might encounter.
I rounded the next switchback and boom, there she was, a beautiful, big rattlesnake making her way across the trail. I was paralyzed. I found myself swirling with negative thoughts while my body felt completely frozen. As all of this was happening for me, I watched as this snake began to casually make her way across the trail, barely glancing my way before she went into the bushes and disappeared. I was shocked. Nothing terrible happened.
As I felt able to move and think clearly again, I began to reflect on my question, “What can I leave behind in order to move forward?”. I began to realize just how attached I had become to my own insecurities and fear. Fear is an important emotion that I want to honor when it is useful to do so. But, by solely focusing on my fear of the rattlesnake encounter for my whole journey, I missed every single other thing going on.
I realized in that moment how this related to my life.
I had been letting all of the potential “rattlesnake encounters” I might face in the world allow me to stay stuck in my insecurities, spinning in circles on what could go wrong with every choice I made or didn’t make.
I realized that I had been letting my actions, thoughts, dreams, desires, and emotions be controlled by my anticipation of a rattlesnake encounter and how the rattlesnake would respond.
I realized that I had been avoiding moving forward in certain areas of my life just because there were potential risks.
I express deep gratitude to this snake and all that she taught me.
If this practice resonated with you and/or you are curious to learn more about Eco-Therapy, please reach out to me!